Letdown Love

When the three of us first thought to start this blog we had grand ideas...of an online community providing information and support for breastfeeding mothers using social media; information that was casual, open, friendly. We wanted people to SEE breastfeeding, so a new mother at least felt more comfortable with the image of a nursing baby, so it would be more normal to her. We hoped and dreamed of some big, awesome movement of breastfeeding mothers. 

When we hit 100 fans on our Facebook Page, we were so excited. Most of our fans were personal friends, colleagues, and online friends we knew from a few places. Then an AMAZING thing happened. People started sharing. They told friends who told friends who told friends, and here we are. We have over 600 fans on the facebook page, and more than 200 followers (what what?!!!!) here on the blog itself. The word has spread! We don't know how you found us, but we are SO GLAD you did. 

We are doing our best to keep up on the latest research, provide you with a safe place to ask questions, get support, and celebrate milestones. Sometimes posting is slower than others, sometimes we are really scraping the bottom of the barrel for inspiration, and sometimes life just gets in the way, but we are REALLY trying to bring you as much as we can in the best way we can.

A few days ago, after we started posting our hindsight stories (Megz's and Christa's), we started receiving private messages, and Mother Hen said to me "I'm kinda glad we started this whole blog thing." It made me smile. We are making a difference, we are helping women take charge of their health and their babies' health. We are touching lives, and it seems that you wonderful people are motivated, interested, and moved by our ideas, thoughts, musings, and stories. We are so happy to be able to reach out.

What I'm trying to say is, first of all, to those of you who were among our first fans...thank you for spreading our little blog around. Thank you for finding enough about what we were saying to spread the word to those you know. To those of you who have joined us over the last few months, thank you for coming over and "sitting down" with The Good Letdown. It means a lot to us to have women, families, and support persons here to share, learn, and laugh with us. 

We hope we are a part of your community, and we hope we continue to grow and reach more mothers. Don't hesitate to share our blog, or a specific topic with pregnant women and families, you have the power to turn on a lightbulb to start changing the outcome for mothers. We have a gap to fill where care providers fall short, to provide information and dispell myths, to make breastfeeding the STANDARD, not the exception. It's our job here to support mothers in giving their babies breastmilk, even if it's only some and not all, because every little bit makes mommies and babies healthier than if they received none at all. 

Thank you, and keep spreading the word. Share with us your thoughts and ideas. :)

Why We Shouldn't Blame Facebook...

...we need to blame our 'peers.' Facebook does not have vast amounts (or any) staff sitting around in cubicles in storage space D scouring their social networking site looking for breastfeeding photos. Photos, links, pages and posts are 'reported' as being obscene by folks just like you and me (only they are a little wrong in the head in a bad way).

From what I understand, when a certain photo/link/post/page receives enough reported hits there is an auto-system that just deletes said item and sends out an informative (sarcastic) email to the owner. The item is then 'gone' without any discussion.

When contacting Facebook for restoration I haven't heard of anyone not being able to get their page back (well, except the original Woman Uncensored personal account that was attached to her fan page that now sits locked and dormant :( WAAAAH!). Guggie Daly, Emma Kwasnica, and many others who have been deleted now have their accounts back due to support and persistence.

Maybe instead of saying that Facebook hates breastfeeding, perhaps we should encourage them to update their system so that there is some communication before something is deleted.

So, as much as we'd love to attack and blame Facebook... it just might not necessarily be their fault. Respond professionally and respectfully when helping these pages and people get restored. We want Facebook on our side after all... because it is our drug of choice and we don't want to peeve off the dealer. :P

Here are details on how you can help with the latest deleted page, The Leaky B@@B

http://leakyboob.blogspot.com/2011/01/why-tlb-on-facebook-and-what-you-can-do.html

Disconnecting to Connect

This is one SERIOUSLY wired society, obviously. We here at The Good Letdown are pretty wired, though Mama Christa and I are significantly MORE wired than Mother Hen...but it's only because of our cell phones. Obviously we spend quite a bit of time plugged in. We browse for blog ideas, contribute to other blogs and fan pages with comments, support eachother and other moms through the web, play around on facebook, text with friends, browse the web from our phones, etc etc etc.... You get the picture.

There have been many articles about the impact of our wired society on how we raise our kids. How many of us have been at the park with the kids, sitting on the bench watching them playing and reflexively picking up that cell phone to check to see if you missed a call or text, or to text someone and start a conversation, or browse the web, or make a phone call. I know I'm guilty. I'm also guilty of browsing and texting while I"m nursing...afterall, Chase is not a great conversationist. But why the almost COMPULSIVE need to be "connected" all the time?

Texting while momming? 

Habit, most likely, it's become habit after two years of being home with my children, I often feel disconnected from other adults and I crave adult conversation, even if it's not face to face. Then one day as I was texting or NAK (Nursing At Keyboard) it occurred to me that one of the reasons breastfeeding is such a bonding experience is because of eye contact with baby. If I'm NAK or texting or browsing or or or...clearly I'm not LOOKING at my sweet baby. Granted, he's looking off into La La Land himself, or staring at the backs of his eyelids, but shouldn't I be more engaged in what I'm doing? Shouldn't I be more "plugged in" to my baby? Yes, for heaven's sake, I should be. I'm a stay at home mom, let's face it...if I don't pick up my cell phone for the next 6 hours...Mama Christa is probably the only person who will notice (we text chronically...it's a little embarrassing to be honest). If I don't check facebook every 5 or 10 minutes...what's going to happen? Nothing. I'll probably get some dishes done or have a nice coloring date with my two-year-old. The thing is, this stuff is almost compulsive, I do it without thinking...I "drive-by" facebook all the time. Because my laptop is often down in our dining/living room area, I often stand, browse, walk away. Then the next time I pass by it, I do it again, then get distracted, browse a blog, putz around, decide to play with some pictures...next thing I know, I'm instant messaging with a few people, on my second cup of coffee, and half an hour or an hour has passed.

So my New Year's goal (hate that term resolution) is to disconnect so that I can connect with my kids more. I'm going to unplug so i can be more plugged in with my little ones. It's going to be a hard habit to break, but I need to break it. Not only do I not spend enough time interacting with my 2-year-old who desperately needs me to be plugged in right now, I'm not paying a lick of attention when I'm nursing...I wonder how this will impact our nursing relationship...I need to engage Chase more at the breast, talk to him, meet his eyes, and play with his little hands. Afterall, who wants to have their face stuffed in a boob, right next to an armpit if no one is making it enjoyable?

How am I going to accomplish it? Well, it needs to be measurable, I need to make steps. So first off, the computer is going back upstairs where the boys nap....not downstairs where we play all day. This will reduce the drive-by-get-distracted facebooking I'm so guilty of. Since I won't leave Aiden downstairs for more than a few minutes at a time, that makes it enforceable...my toddler is effectively holding me accountable. As far as the cell-phone, I'm not going to take it to my nursing chair anymore. It can stay on the counter or table while I"m nursing so I don't have the temptation to browse the net or start texting when I should be talking to Aiden and plugging in to Chase. Computer time will be limited to simultaneous naps, which means Facebook is going to see far less of me, my doula board will see far less of me, and my e mail will see far less of me...but my KIDS will get more of me, the more of me that they deserve. What will I do instead? How about the dishes? A load of laundry (I could easily do 1 to 2 loads a day, if I have diapers, most days of the week) perhaps? Dusting? Coloring with Aiden or playing with his trains with him? the list goes on. This will make me a better mother I'm sure.

My concern is that part of the reason I do it is to connect with my friends...so to remedy this roadblock, I'm going to insist on more playdates...rotating homes is a great way to prevent constant huge messes, get out of the house, and get some mom-time while the kids get some kid-time.

What do you think about disconnecting to connect or unplugging to plug-in? What are your goals this year as they relate to your children, your life, your spouse, your home?