This old post lays out my symptoms and stuff. So, I wanted to report back to my readers and let you know how it all went.
First, let me tell you about my doctor. Oh. My. God. He was fabulous. I was ready to fight tooth and nail for dessicated thyroid instead of synthetic T4, was prepared to be less than honest about my iodine use if he seemed anti-supplement, and was certainly not going to tell him about my diet, which I hide from every medical professional within a 10 mile radius. Instead, he said he always prescribes dessicated thyroid first, was supportive of my iodine supplementation (though he wasn't super knowledgeable), and HE told ME to get off of wheat, soy, and lowfat dairy. I got to tell him we never eat soy or lowfat dairy, and almost never eat wheat. The man congratulated me! He was glad that my daughter drinks raw milk, and and he praised butter. I was super impressed that he took a really thorough medical history, asking lots of questions, really trying to get to know me and my symptoms. His recommendations were dessicated thyroid (I'm taking 90 mg, which is a grain and a half) and metformin (a metabolism drug for prediabetics).
I am not taking the metformin because I do not have any of the symptoms of diabetes, except being overweight, which I hope the dessicated thyroid will improve. My blood sugar levels are fine, and I don't take medicine I don't need as a preventative thing.
I am taking the dessicated thyroid and 25 gm of iodine and 200 mcg of selenium. And I feel better. A lot better. Dessicated thyroid is like speed. I have energy again to exercise, to read hard books, to do things with Livy. I might be just a little over-medicated, cause I am kind of jittery and manic, but I am going to give the dose some time before I change. It's possible that I have been so miserable that normal amounts of energy are feeling manic to me, and I just need time to adjust.
I don't like the iodine dreams. People have said that their dreams got more vivid and that they remembered them when they woke up, and that is happening to me too. Annoying. When I am sleeping, I want to be out cold. I don't like this 24/7 brain activity. It's stressful never to get to just be unconscious.
The weirdest thing for me is the psychological adjustment. I have always seen myself as a relaxed, not planny, not very ambitious kind of person. I think of myself as the butterfly who flits about adding loveliness and fun to the world, not as the ant, busy with world-improving tasks. And it's weird to have so much drive now. The drive has come with the energy. I get out of bed, and I get down to business on the jobs I need to do. And while that might sound good and I admire my friends who are like that, it doesn't feel like me. It's a little scary.
My friend Jenn told me I should just relax and see who emerges, and that's good advice. But it is scary to feel like something as changeable as the levels of T3 in my body controls my basic personality. I am not sure I want to be an ant. I'm not sure I want to be the person who writes a blog post every day cause there are so many things to say and so much energy to say it with. Am I going to stop being Anne and start being Gilbert? Cause that won't work for me.
Anyway, deep breaths. So far, except for this upsetting psychological weirdness, the treatment is working out great. I am enjoying my life again (or somebody's weirdly productive life, anyway).
