Papaw was a serious fisherman. After he retired, he went fishing nearly every day except Sundays. When he died, Mama found calendars in his old WWII foot locker that had a count of every fish he caught every day for years. I remember him coming home from fishing with a long stringer of fish, mostly crappie with a few catfish mixed in. He would carry them to the backyard where he had set up an old table for cleaning fish. I would watch as he used his electric knife to fillet all the fish, and then we would bury the carcasses in a big hole far out near the back fence. Mimi would freeze the fish.
When the outside freezer was completely full of fish fillets, we would have a fish fry. My mom and dad and I would come over, along with other family and some friends from church. Papaw would set up a huge cauldron of oil on the backporch for frying the fish that Mimi breaded in cornmeal. He would sit by the fryer, smoking a cigar, talking with the other men. Inside, Mimi would make the hushpuppies. Full of onions, she would tell me; that was the secret. She would scoop the batter with a spoon and drop each one into boiling oil on the stove. When the hushpuppy was ready, it would pop brown and round to the top of the oil and float there. She scooped them out and let them drip on a plate with paper towels.
I am absolutely sure that Mimi served other food with the fish and hushpuppies, but try as I might, I cannot remember any of it. I cannot remember who all came or what they talked about. The fish and hushpuppies, the way they tasted and the way they were prepared, overshadowed everything else, and when I eat them now at a restaurant, I always think of Papaw and his cigar on the backporch and of Mimi fishing floating hushpuppies out of a saucepan.
2/27/10
Pride and Prejudice, if Pemberley were a Double Wide
That's how much I do not like the movie version of Pride and Prejudice starring Kiera Knightley. Let me just start off with her. Kiera Knightley does not have a lick of gravity or sparkle, and she is completely unbelievable as Elizabeth Bennet. Her mouth hangs open showing her whole bottom row of teeth for half of the movie. I don't know what her costumer and hairdresser were thinking. Her clothes make it seem like her family is poor, when they are moderately wealthy. Her hair is almost always messy and plain. Keira Knightley is a very pretty woman, and it seems like they uglied her up on purpose for the movie.
Now, on to the screenplay. They took nearly every line of the book and changed it just a little bit to make it sound awkward and trite. I understand that the screenplay cannot be a copy of the book, but Pride and Prejudice is a success for a reason. Why not use as much of the original language as is possible while adjusting for the understanding of the modern audience and the length of the movie?
Lizzy's character is completely strange in the movie, for more reasons than just Keira Knightley's acting inability. Since when does she swing in a cattleyard in her bare feet? When would she ever wander around Mr. Collins's house in her pajamas? When would she actually show up at Netherfield with her hair down around her shoulders? It was ridiculous.
The other characters are no better. Could anyone imagine Mr. Darcy bursting into rooms without announcing himself, especially to deliver letters to half-dressed ladies? Would Georgiana run to a complete stranger giggling without being introduced? Would the Gardners eat in the public rooms of a loud inn? Would Lady Catherine arrive at Longborne in the middle of the night and talk with Elizabeth while she in her pajamas? With the way Lizzy wanders about alone with men (especially the last scene), it's hard to understand how they could have all been so shocked when Lydia ran off with Wickham.
The use of the scenery is weird as well. Most of the views of the Bennett's estate seem to be dirty. They weren't a family of farmers; they were landed gentry. Why would there be a pig in the house? And I thought it was extremely weird that the camera should focus in on its testicles. What is that supposed to mean? P&P has the least amount of testosterone of any book in the English language; why would it have testicles in it?
The only bright spot in this movie is Judi Dench. Her portrayal of Lady Catherine de Burgh was marvelous, as is every role I have ever seen her in. I only wish the screenplay had included more scenes with her in them. Mr. Bennet is not too bad, either.
The movie was not at all elegant, not at all refined, not witty and bright like a Jane Austen novel. Mr. Darcy is a milk sop, and I don't believe him capable of feeling passion. Lizzy is dull and ordinary and constantly appears in her nightgown. Caroline Bingley wears sleeveless dresses to a ball. Wickham is about 16 years old and not capable enough to pull off a seduction. It is just all ridiculous.
The movie has such a trashy feeling, I half expected Mr. Darcy and Lizzy to end up with a shotgun wedding and chug some Budweiser at the reception. Book adaptation FAIL. Go see the A&E version with Colin Firth, or even the BBC version.
Now, on to the screenplay. They took nearly every line of the book and changed it just a little bit to make it sound awkward and trite. I understand that the screenplay cannot be a copy of the book, but Pride and Prejudice is a success for a reason. Why not use as much of the original language as is possible while adjusting for the understanding of the modern audience and the length of the movie?
Lizzy's character is completely strange in the movie, for more reasons than just Keira Knightley's acting inability. Since when does she swing in a cattleyard in her bare feet? When would she ever wander around Mr. Collins's house in her pajamas? When would she actually show up at Netherfield with her hair down around her shoulders? It was ridiculous.
The other characters are no better. Could anyone imagine Mr. Darcy bursting into rooms without announcing himself, especially to deliver letters to half-dressed ladies? Would Georgiana run to a complete stranger giggling without being introduced? Would the Gardners eat in the public rooms of a loud inn? Would Lady Catherine arrive at Longborne in the middle of the night and talk with Elizabeth while she in her pajamas? With the way Lizzy wanders about alone with men (especially the last scene), it's hard to understand how they could have all been so shocked when Lydia ran off with Wickham.
The use of the scenery is weird as well. Most of the views of the Bennett's estate seem to be dirty. They weren't a family of farmers; they were landed gentry. Why would there be a pig in the house? And I thought it was extremely weird that the camera should focus in on its testicles. What is that supposed to mean? P&P has the least amount of testosterone of any book in the English language; why would it have testicles in it?
The only bright spot in this movie is Judi Dench. Her portrayal of Lady Catherine de Burgh was marvelous, as is every role I have ever seen her in. I only wish the screenplay had included more scenes with her in them. Mr. Bennet is not too bad, either.
The movie was not at all elegant, not at all refined, not witty and bright like a Jane Austen novel. Mr. Darcy is a milk sop, and I don't believe him capable of feeling passion. Lizzy is dull and ordinary and constantly appears in her nightgown. Caroline Bingley wears sleeveless dresses to a ball. Wickham is about 16 years old and not capable enough to pull off a seduction. It is just all ridiculous.
The movie has such a trashy feeling, I half expected Mr. Darcy and Lizzy to end up with a shotgun wedding and chug some Budweiser at the reception. Book adaptation FAIL. Go see the A&E version with Colin Firth, or even the BBC version.
Want to Know My Deepest Darkest Secrets?
Or just some more mundane stuff?
Ask me anything: http://www.formspring.me/kellyelmore
I totally love to tell people stuff, so this just works out great.
And by the way, I ripped this whole idea off from Rational Jenn, so I hope she remembers that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
Ask me anything: http://www.formspring.me/kellyelmore
I totally love to tell people stuff, so this just works out great.
And by the way, I ripped this whole idea off from Rational Jenn, so I hope she remembers that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
2/26/10
Howards End Quotes
I am not quite finished with E.M. Forster's novel Howards End, and I am still in the foggy, misty stage where the novel hangs around me, soaking me to the skin. So, I am not quite ready to talk seriously about the book. All I can do right now is sigh heavily and share some quotes I like.
"She felt that those who prepare for all the emergencies of life beforehand may equip themselves at the expense of joy. It is necessary to prepare for an examination, or a dinner-party, or a possible fall in the price of stock; those who attempt human relations must adopt another method, or fail."
"To be humble and kind, to go straight ahead, to love people rather than pity them, to remember the submerged - well one can't do all these things at once, worse luck, because they're so contradictory. It's then that proportion comes in - to live by proportion. Don't begin with proportion. Only prigs do that. Let proportion come in as a last resource, when the better things have failed."
"The German is always on the lookout for beauty. He may miss it through stupidity, or misinterpret it, but he is always asking beauty to enter his life, and I believe that in the end it will come."
"Life is indeed dangerous, but not in the way morality would have us believe. It is indeed unmanageable, but the essence of it is not a battle. It is unmanageable because it is a romance, and its essence is romantic beauty. Margaret hoped that for the future she would be less cautious, not more cautious than she had been in the past."
"The outburst ended in a swamp of books. No disrespect to these great names. The fault is ours, not theirs. They mean us to use them for sign-posts, and are not to blame if, in our weakness, we mistake the sign-post for the the destination."
It may be a terrible blasphemy, but I think I like Howards End better than A Room With a View.
"She felt that those who prepare for all the emergencies of life beforehand may equip themselves at the expense of joy. It is necessary to prepare for an examination, or a dinner-party, or a possible fall in the price of stock; those who attempt human relations must adopt another method, or fail."
"To be humble and kind, to go straight ahead, to love people rather than pity them, to remember the submerged - well one can't do all these things at once, worse luck, because they're so contradictory. It's then that proportion comes in - to live by proportion. Don't begin with proportion. Only prigs do that. Let proportion come in as a last resource, when the better things have failed."
"The German is always on the lookout for beauty. He may miss it through stupidity, or misinterpret it, but he is always asking beauty to enter his life, and I believe that in the end it will come."
"Life is indeed dangerous, but not in the way morality would have us believe. It is indeed unmanageable, but the essence of it is not a battle. It is unmanageable because it is a romance, and its essence is romantic beauty. Margaret hoped that for the future she would be less cautious, not more cautious than she had been in the past."
"The outburst ended in a swamp of books. No disrespect to these great names. The fault is ours, not theirs. They mean us to use them for sign-posts, and are not to blame if, in our weakness, we mistake the sign-post for the the destination."
It may be a terrible blasphemy, but I think I like Howards End better than A Room With a View.
2/23/10
Three Fundamental Rules for Not Raising Brats or Being One Yourself
One of my favorite hobbies is getting myself worked up into a frenzy, calling Jenn, and ranting about all the people, ideas, blog posts, news articles, overheard snippets of conversation, and scenes from movies that are WRONG. I have found that whenever I get into an uproar about any parenting issue, my complaints and solutions (of course, I always have the RIGHT one) come down to three rules. If I were going to make a trifold pamplet on parenting, these three rules would be the headers of each section. They apply to parents and kids alike. Here they are, for you edification.
1. Mind your own business.
Ex. 1: Child doesn't want to play soccer/read classic English novel/learn piano/do the thing his parents wish they had done and have now decided to inflict on child. Solution? Parent, mind your own business.
Ex. 2: Child: "Mom, (insert sibling name here)is (insert annyoing but not dangerous activity being reported solely to get sibling in trouble here)." Solution? Child, mind your own business.
2. Get off your butt.
Ex. 1: Child is doing some annoying thing and won't stop when parent says, "Stop doing that annoying thing!" Solution? Get off your butt. Armchair parents, like armchair quarterbacks, never go to the Super Bowl.
Ex. 2: Child yells, "Will you get me some milk?" Solution? Is child sick or injured or 14 months old? Then child needs to get off his butt. Same answer applies for "Mom, I'm hungry," "Mom, I'm cold," "Mom, I can't find my shoes," and "Mom, I spilled water all over the bathroom floor."
3. Suck it up.
Ex. 1: Parent: "My child is intense/sensitive/introverted/extroverted/stubborn/slow to warm up/whatever other temperamental trait annoys you." Solution? Suck it up. You get what you get. Stop whining about it, stop "putting the I wish above the It is," and suck it up.
Ex. 2: Parent is afraid little Johnny may be forever scarred by mom having a life away from Johnny, by finding out that he isn't the smartest or funniest or fastest, by not winning a trophy, by not getting all the things he wanted for Christmas, or by hearing "no." Solution? Johnny will have to suck it up.
I really think that these rules might be the fundamental ones for all human interaction, but so far, I have only applied them to parenting. I'm pretty sure they would work just as well in romance, friendship, and the workplace.
1. Mind your own business.
Ex. 1: Child doesn't want to play soccer/read classic English novel/learn piano/do the thing his parents wish they had done and have now decided to inflict on child. Solution? Parent, mind your own business.
Ex. 2: Child: "Mom, (insert sibling name here)
2. Get off your butt.
Ex. 1: Child is doing some annoying thing and won't stop when parent says, "Stop doing that annoying thing!" Solution? Get off your butt. Armchair parents, like armchair quarterbacks, never go to the Super Bowl.
Ex. 2: Child yells, "Will you get me some milk?" Solution? Is child sick or injured or 14 months old? Then child needs to get off his butt. Same answer applies for "Mom, I'm hungry," "Mom, I'm cold," "Mom, I can't find my shoes," and "Mom, I spilled water all over the bathroom floor."
3. Suck it up.
Ex. 1: Parent: "My child is intense/sensitive/introverted/extroverted/stubborn/slow to warm up/whatever other temperamental trait annoys you." Solution? Suck it up. You get what you get. Stop whining about it, stop "putting the I wish above the It is," and suck it up.
Ex. 2: Parent is afraid little Johnny may be forever scarred by mom having a life away from Johnny, by finding out that he isn't the smartest or funniest or fastest, by not winning a trophy, by not getting all the things he wanted for Christmas, or by hearing "no." Solution? Johnny will have to suck it up.
I really think that these rules might be the fundamental ones for all human interaction, but so far, I have only applied them to parenting. I'm pretty sure they would work just as well in romance, friendship, and the workplace.
2/22/10
In Which I Justify My Addiction to Twitter, Facebook, and the Blogosphere
About me: I am EXTREMELY extroverted. If you are familiar with the Myers-Brigg test, you will understand when I say that I score 100% E every time. I could be around people almost all the time. I hardly feel like I have finished doing something until I tell someone all about it. My ideal living arrangement would probably be kind of communal. Maybe separate suites for families with a big common living area and kitchen and garden and outdoor space. I have lots of good friends, locally, but (kind of strange to me) these folks like to spend lots of time doing solitary kinds of activities. My boyfriend lives with me, but he spends long hours at work and needs alone time sometimes at home.
About our world: I think that people are kind of isolated in the modern, suburban world. We live in our separate houses, mostly inside and away from other families. People usually work away from their home and community. Most people don't live within spitting distance of their extended families and dearest friends. We schedule time to see those we like, but we don't spontaneously meet up with friends and relatives in the course of the day. This works fine for some people, but it doesn't work for me.
Fast forward to having a baby and staying at home, and all those things became a recipe for loneliness. It was hard giving up going out into the adult world every day and interacting with people. Since I returned to work and to school, I have been much happier over-all. But this semester, I am working very little and out of school again, and I feel isolated during much of the day.
This is where Twitter and Facebook and Blogging have made such a difference for me. They feel like a common room, where I wander in, hear what people are talking about, join in some of the conversations, get to know people spontaneously, feel surrounded by personalities. Whenever I happen to have time to be on the internet, there is always someone else, someone I share values and interests with, looking for conversation and connection too.
I would rather that my Twitter buddies, Facebook friends, and bloggers I read all move to Atlanta, live right here in my neighborhood, and have frequent block parties and chats over coffee, but I am grateful to Al Gore (cause he invented the internet) for the online connection I can have with these people.
I don't know why other people use these social networks, but I would be interested in hearing whether my experience with them is the norm.
About our world: I think that people are kind of isolated in the modern, suburban world. We live in our separate houses, mostly inside and away from other families. People usually work away from their home and community. Most people don't live within spitting distance of their extended families and dearest friends. We schedule time to see those we like, but we don't spontaneously meet up with friends and relatives in the course of the day. This works fine for some people, but it doesn't work for me.
Fast forward to having a baby and staying at home, and all those things became a recipe for loneliness. It was hard giving up going out into the adult world every day and interacting with people. Since I returned to work and to school, I have been much happier over-all. But this semester, I am working very little and out of school again, and I feel isolated during much of the day.
This is where Twitter and Facebook and Blogging have made such a difference for me. They feel like a common room, where I wander in, hear what people are talking about, join in some of the conversations, get to know people spontaneously, feel surrounded by personalities. Whenever I happen to have time to be on the internet, there is always someone else, someone I share values and interests with, looking for conversation and connection too.
I would rather that my Twitter buddies, Facebook friends, and bloggers I read all move to Atlanta, live right here in my neighborhood, and have frequent block parties and chats over coffee, but I am grateful to Al Gore (cause he invented the internet) for the online connection I can have with these people.
I don't know why other people use these social networks, but I would be interested in hearing whether my experience with them is the norm.
2/21/10
Melinda Nursing Owen
In honor of another ridiculous Facebook breastfeeding photo ban, here are pictures of Melinda nursing Owen. Again, all I can say to people who are scared that breasts, being used to nurture children in the way mothers have been nurturing them for millenia, will somehow cause society to collapse into an immoral chaos, is GET OVER IT.
2/18/10
Why You Should Read Percy Jackson
I recently read the entire Percy Jackson and the Olympians series, and tonight, I saw the movie. Here's my general review of the books. There will be a few minor spoilers, but nothing major.
If you like the Harry Potter series, I really think you would probably like these books, though they aren't quite as good. They are missing the epic struggle between good and evil that is the best thing about Harry Potter. When the major story arc involves conflict between the Olympian gods and between the Olympians and the Titans, there is no good and evil. The Greek gods are basically amoral, but the demigods and lesser mythological creatures do strive to be good. Even with that less than ideal attribute, I loved these books. Here's why:
1. They are full of Greek myths (and not just the biggies) wrapped up in a really cool modern package. Olympus, for instance, is above the Empire State Building. The Underworld is beneath L.A., and the Lotus Eaters are in a Las Vegas casino. You'll meet the Cyclopes, the Sirens, and the Fates, but they are all modern in their own special way.
2. They integration of Ancient Greece and modern America is super cool. Ever wonder what causes ADD and dyslexia? Find out in these books. (Hint: It has to do with battle senses and Ancient Greek.) How does a satyr who goes to a normal school hide his hooves? Wanna know why cab drivers in NYC drive so crazy? It is just so brilliant now well the myths are woven an essentially modern story.
3. One of the best features of the Harry Potter series that these books share is a fabulous group of main characters whose love for and devotion to each other are inspiring. The 4 main characters (one only appears later in the series) have different strengths and weaknesses that the group must leverage to succeed. Just like Harry, Hermione, and Ron.
The movie was okay. I'd say about as strong as the Harry Potter movies. They left out a lot of my favorite details and changed some things, but the adaptation was pretty true to the story and lots of fun. Who doesn't want to see Uma Thurman play Medusa? And The Parthenon in Nashville is in the movie, and we've been there, so that's cool. But read the books first.
Another Day in the Life Post
I love reading these, and I love writing them. So here goes another.
Livy woke up about an hour before me, ate some breakfast, and played quietly (relatively) in her room. After I got up, I headed off to work. She watched a movie (Max and Ruby), did some elaborate imaginative play with some empty boxes and two jump ropes, and got dressed.
When I got home, we went to lunch with Aaron at Ruby Tuesday's before he left for work. While Aaron and I chatted, Livy did a word search on her menu.
After lunch, she and I came home and played two games of Jr. Labyrinth (a rocking good game, by the way). We are definitely going to invest in the adult version soon, cause she has figured it out and could handle more, I think. The game is basically a maze that keeps moving around, and you have to move through it, using strategy, to get to several different goals.
Then, she read two Bob Books out loud to me. They are very simple phonetic (almost completely) stories. Then, we pulled out some flash cards that have a word on the front and a picture on the back, and she read them to me. We flipped them over dramatically to see if she was right.
About halfway through, she started crying and told me that Morgan (2nd child of Jenn) is a better reader than she is. Well, it's true. Though Morgan is 18 months younger, she is a far better reader. So, we talked about how different people learn different things at different times. I told her some differences of when her dad and I learned different skills. And I pointed out some things I thought she was best at. Eventually, she said she felt better.
Next, she pogo sticked in the living room. I think she chose this activity because physical activity is her comfort zone. She is super coordinated and has no trouble learning any physical skill. So, I think she chose pogo sticking because it made her feel confident again.
After I played on the internet and tried to ignore the sounds of crashing and hysterical laughter from the living room, we went to pick up our super wonderful raw milk from our super wonderful local farmer. On the way there and back, Livy did 5 pages from a math workbook on place value. We are total car-schoolers. Something about driving in the car (perhaps the inability to do anything physical?) makes Livy want to do math. She has learned almost every bit of math she knows (addition, subtraction, reading a clock, counting money, and now place value) in the car. About 50% of it was on our road trip. We also sometimes do math at the library, cause she sees the older kids doing their homework, and she thinks its cool to sit at the little tables and work like they do.
When we got home, we went out to the backyard and jumped on the trampoline for about 45 minutes. It nearly killed me (but it was fun), while she thought it was a light and enjoyable stretch of her muscles. :) We challenged each other to do x number of tuck jumps, seat drops, etc. We both worked on our front flips. Mine is pretty reliable, though I sometimes fall on my butt at the end; Livy is just learning. Then, we swept the leaves and sticks off the trampoline. Maybe we should have done that first, so they didn't poke us in the rear while doing seat drops.
After we came in and I obsessively checked my twitter feed, I worked for about an hour and a half on my French, while Livy watched more Max and Ruby, played her keyboard, cleaned her room (unbidden), and organized all her boxes and tables into a lizard (plastic) habitat (including a lizard exercise arena, a lizard shop (where lizards go to shop, not a shop selling lizards), and a lizard bedroom (to be shared with frogs and snakes).
Finally, I took her to meet up with her dad, since Thursday night is when she heads over to his house for the weekend. My plans for tonight are to work more on French, read some of Howard's End and some Guns, Germs, and Steel, and take a bath (with, though sadly not in, wine).
The end.
Livy woke up about an hour before me, ate some breakfast, and played quietly (relatively) in her room. After I got up, I headed off to work. She watched a movie (Max and Ruby), did some elaborate imaginative play with some empty boxes and two jump ropes, and got dressed.
When I got home, we went to lunch with Aaron at Ruby Tuesday's before he left for work. While Aaron and I chatted, Livy did a word search on her menu.
After lunch, she and I came home and played two games of Jr. Labyrinth (a rocking good game, by the way). We are definitely going to invest in the adult version soon, cause she has figured it out and could handle more, I think. The game is basically a maze that keeps moving around, and you have to move through it, using strategy, to get to several different goals.
Then, she read two Bob Books out loud to me. They are very simple phonetic (almost completely) stories. Then, we pulled out some flash cards that have a word on the front and a picture on the back, and she read them to me. We flipped them over dramatically to see if she was right.
About halfway through, she started crying and told me that Morgan (2nd child of Jenn) is a better reader than she is. Well, it's true. Though Morgan is 18 months younger, she is a far better reader. So, we talked about how different people learn different things at different times. I told her some differences of when her dad and I learned different skills. And I pointed out some things I thought she was best at. Eventually, she said she felt better.
Next, she pogo sticked in the living room. I think she chose this activity because physical activity is her comfort zone. She is super coordinated and has no trouble learning any physical skill. So, I think she chose pogo sticking because it made her feel confident again.
After I played on the internet and tried to ignore the sounds of crashing and hysterical laughter from the living room, we went to pick up our super wonderful raw milk from our super wonderful local farmer. On the way there and back, Livy did 5 pages from a math workbook on place value. We are total car-schoolers. Something about driving in the car (perhaps the inability to do anything physical?) makes Livy want to do math. She has learned almost every bit of math she knows (addition, subtraction, reading a clock, counting money, and now place value) in the car. About 50% of it was on our road trip. We also sometimes do math at the library, cause she sees the older kids doing their homework, and she thinks its cool to sit at the little tables and work like they do.
When we got home, we went out to the backyard and jumped on the trampoline for about 45 minutes. It nearly killed me (but it was fun), while she thought it was a light and enjoyable stretch of her muscles. :) We challenged each other to do x number of tuck jumps, seat drops, etc. We both worked on our front flips. Mine is pretty reliable, though I sometimes fall on my butt at the end; Livy is just learning. Then, we swept the leaves and sticks off the trampoline. Maybe we should have done that first, so they didn't poke us in the rear while doing seat drops.
After we came in and I obsessively checked my twitter feed, I worked for about an hour and a half on my French, while Livy watched more Max and Ruby, played her keyboard, cleaned her room (unbidden), and organized all her boxes and tables into a lizard (plastic) habitat (including a lizard exercise arena, a lizard shop (where lizards go to shop, not a shop selling lizards), and a lizard bedroom (to be shared with frogs and snakes).
Finally, I took her to meet up with her dad, since Thursday night is when she heads over to his house for the weekend. My plans for tonight are to work more on French, read some of Howard's End and some Guns, Germs, and Steel, and take a bath (with, though sadly not in, wine).
The end.
2/12/10
Hypothyroidism Update
This old post lays out my symptoms and stuff. So, I wanted to report back to my readers and let you know how it all went.
First, let me tell you about my doctor. Oh. My. God. He was fabulous. I was ready to fight tooth and nail for dessicated thyroid instead of synthetic T4, was prepared to be less than honest about my iodine use if he seemed anti-supplement, and was certainly not going to tell him about my diet, which I hide from every medical professional within a 10 mile radius. Instead, he said he always prescribes dessicated thyroid first, was supportive of my iodine supplementation (though he wasn't super knowledgeable), and HE told ME to get off of wheat, soy, and lowfat dairy. I got to tell him we never eat soy or lowfat dairy, and almost never eat wheat. The man congratulated me! He was glad that my daughter drinks raw milk, and and he praised butter. I was super impressed that he took a really thorough medical history, asking lots of questions, really trying to get to know me and my symptoms. His recommendations were dessicated thyroid (I'm taking 90 mg, which is a grain and a half) and metformin (a metabolism drug for prediabetics).
I am not taking the metformin because I do not have any of the symptoms of diabetes, except being overweight, which I hope the dessicated thyroid will improve. My blood sugar levels are fine, and I don't take medicine I don't need as a preventative thing.
I am taking the dessicated thyroid and 25 gm of iodine and 200 mcg of selenium. And I feel better. A lot better. Dessicated thyroid is like speed. I have energy again to exercise, to read hard books, to do things with Livy. I might be just a little over-medicated, cause I am kind of jittery and manic, but I am going to give the dose some time before I change. It's possible that I have been so miserable that normal amounts of energy are feeling manic to me, and I just need time to adjust.
I don't like the iodine dreams. People have said that their dreams got more vivid and that they remembered them when they woke up, and that is happening to me too. Annoying. When I am sleeping, I want to be out cold. I don't like this 24/7 brain activity. It's stressful never to get to just be unconscious.
The weirdest thing for me is the psychological adjustment. I have always seen myself as a relaxed, not planny, not very ambitious kind of person. I think of myself as the butterfly who flits about adding loveliness and fun to the world, not as the ant, busy with world-improving tasks. And it's weird to have so much drive now. The drive has come with the energy. I get out of bed, and I get down to business on the jobs I need to do. And while that might sound good and I admire my friends who are like that, it doesn't feel like me. It's a little scary.
My friend Jenn told me I should just relax and see who emerges, and that's good advice. But it is scary to feel like something as changeable as the levels of T3 in my body controls my basic personality. I am not sure I want to be an ant. I'm not sure I want to be the person who writes a blog post every day cause there are so many things to say and so much energy to say it with. Am I going to stop being Anne and start being Gilbert? Cause that won't work for me.
Anyway, deep breaths. So far, except for this upsetting psychological weirdness, the treatment is working out great. I am enjoying my life again (or somebody's weirdly productive life, anyway).
First, let me tell you about my doctor. Oh. My. God. He was fabulous. I was ready to fight tooth and nail for dessicated thyroid instead of synthetic T4, was prepared to be less than honest about my iodine use if he seemed anti-supplement, and was certainly not going to tell him about my diet, which I hide from every medical professional within a 10 mile radius. Instead, he said he always prescribes dessicated thyroid first, was supportive of my iodine supplementation (though he wasn't super knowledgeable), and HE told ME to get off of wheat, soy, and lowfat dairy. I got to tell him we never eat soy or lowfat dairy, and almost never eat wheat. The man congratulated me! He was glad that my daughter drinks raw milk, and and he praised butter. I was super impressed that he took a really thorough medical history, asking lots of questions, really trying to get to know me and my symptoms. His recommendations were dessicated thyroid (I'm taking 90 mg, which is a grain and a half) and metformin (a metabolism drug for prediabetics).
I am not taking the metformin because I do not have any of the symptoms of diabetes, except being overweight, which I hope the dessicated thyroid will improve. My blood sugar levels are fine, and I don't take medicine I don't need as a preventative thing.
I am taking the dessicated thyroid and 25 gm of iodine and 200 mcg of selenium. And I feel better. A lot better. Dessicated thyroid is like speed. I have energy again to exercise, to read hard books, to do things with Livy. I might be just a little over-medicated, cause I am kind of jittery and manic, but I am going to give the dose some time before I change. It's possible that I have been so miserable that normal amounts of energy are feeling manic to me, and I just need time to adjust.
I don't like the iodine dreams. People have said that their dreams got more vivid and that they remembered them when they woke up, and that is happening to me too. Annoying. When I am sleeping, I want to be out cold. I don't like this 24/7 brain activity. It's stressful never to get to just be unconscious.
The weirdest thing for me is the psychological adjustment. I have always seen myself as a relaxed, not planny, not very ambitious kind of person. I think of myself as the butterfly who flits about adding loveliness and fun to the world, not as the ant, busy with world-improving tasks. And it's weird to have so much drive now. The drive has come with the energy. I get out of bed, and I get down to business on the jobs I need to do. And while that might sound good and I admire my friends who are like that, it doesn't feel like me. It's a little scary.
My friend Jenn told me I should just relax and see who emerges, and that's good advice. But it is scary to feel like something as changeable as the levels of T3 in my body controls my basic personality. I am not sure I want to be an ant. I'm not sure I want to be the person who writes a blog post every day cause there are so many things to say and so much energy to say it with. Am I going to stop being Anne and start being Gilbert? Cause that won't work for me.
Anyway, deep breaths. So far, except for this upsetting psychological weirdness, the treatment is working out great. I am enjoying my life again (or somebody's weirdly productive life, anyway).
2/11/10
Why Our Lives Should Not Be Child-Centered
I'm defining child-centered as family life that revolves almost completely around what the children want to do, the children's schedules, and the children feelings and likes and dislikes. Here are some reasons it isn't good for families to be child-centered:
1. It isn't selfish. Rational people who are trying to be happy should think about themselves first. "What do I want to do today?" should be the primary question we are asking ourselves. This doesn't mean we don't spend time with our kids and do things that make them happy, as well. I hope most parents get real pleasure out of doing things with their kids and out of their kids pleasure. However, playing Hi Ho Cherry-O 10 times in a row every day might bring pleasure to your 4 year old and drive you crazy. So quit. Invite a friend over who loves Hi Ho Cherry-O.
2. It breeds resentment. This is a corollary of number 1. Any time we do something we don't really want to do, we are going to resent it. That's the nature of sacrifice. I don't want to wake up at age 50 realizing that I spent all those good years only on Livy. I want to know that I did things with her, with Aaron, and some just with me; I want to know that my life was for my own benefit, not just to give someone else a good start.
3. It gives kids a fake sense of their own importance in the world. I want Livy to grow up knowing that she is the center of her own world but not anyone else's. In the grown-up world, no one (not even your spouse) is going to care as much about your values as they do about their own. Childhood is a great time to learn that, though we care very much about each other in our families and want to know stuff about what the others are doing, our own values are number 1. And that even applies to mom and dad.
4. It robs kids of the chance to see adults doing adult things. Children are desperate to be grown; the magic of childhood is only magic to adults. When we make our lives all about kid stuff, our children don't see us doing the kinds of things they will one day do. They don't have a model of adult behavior to emulate as they strive to mature. It's good for kids to see us having adult conversations, reading adult books, and doing adult work.
5. It is annoying to other adults. If you want to have friends, you better have hobbies and work and interests outside of your kids. Cause Grandma is the only person who thinks your kids are as interesting as you do. And even she probably has a limit.
Sometimes living life in a non-child-centered way (self-centered, perhaps?) is active, rather than passive. It means saying yes, not just no. I try to include Livy in as many of my activities as I can because she wants to be with me and she wants to learn how to be an adult. I like for her to play at my feet while I discuss intellectual property with a friend. I like for her to be at a friend's party so that she can learn the social skills adults use to interact with friends. I like for her to travel with me because I like for her to see the world, the real world, not just playgrounds and jumpy castles, but the museums, the shops, and the restaurants. I like for her to hear my music, see my TV shows and movies, and hear my books, so that she knows that The Wiggles, Backyardigans, and Dr. Seuss are not the only art there is in the world.
Now, lest someone use this post for evil, I do not mean that parents never have to do anything they don't want to do. I didn't particularly want to change 800 million dirty diapers, but that's what I signed on for, and I had to do it. But we do not sign on for 18 years of being subject to someone else's values. We do the things that are necessary for children to grow and flourish (meeting physical and emotional needs), but 10 games of Hi Ho Cherry-O is not a need for anyone. My child will not be scarred and feel unloved if I do not stay and watch every soccer game she plays. She will not have poor self-esteem because I did not want to hear her describe her 48th painting of the day in excruciating detail. She will not be conceptually impaired because she overheard me talking about my political opinions before she understands their philosophical underpinnings. In fact, I think that she will grow up better knowing that I have adult stuff to do and that one day, she will have adult stuff to do too.
Here's a picture of me and Livy, at an Atlanta Objectivist party with (gasp!) beer and guitar playing. Just before this I was making up funny songs, and now Reid is giving us a solo. It was late at night. She was not in bed, dreaming of the magic of childhood. She was in the world, watching adults interact, and learning how to be a grown-up Objectivist. About 15 minutes later, she passed out on a couch.
1. It isn't selfish. Rational people who are trying to be happy should think about themselves first. "What do I want to do today?" should be the primary question we are asking ourselves. This doesn't mean we don't spend time with our kids and do things that make them happy, as well. I hope most parents get real pleasure out of doing things with their kids and out of their kids pleasure. However, playing Hi Ho Cherry-O 10 times in a row every day might bring pleasure to your 4 year old and drive you crazy. So quit. Invite a friend over who loves Hi Ho Cherry-O.
2. It breeds resentment. This is a corollary of number 1. Any time we do something we don't really want to do, we are going to resent it. That's the nature of sacrifice. I don't want to wake up at age 50 realizing that I spent all those good years only on Livy. I want to know that I did things with her, with Aaron, and some just with me; I want to know that my life was for my own benefit, not just to give someone else a good start.
3. It gives kids a fake sense of their own importance in the world. I want Livy to grow up knowing that she is the center of her own world but not anyone else's. In the grown-up world, no one (not even your spouse) is going to care as much about your values as they do about their own. Childhood is a great time to learn that, though we care very much about each other in our families and want to know stuff about what the others are doing, our own values are number 1. And that even applies to mom and dad.
4. It robs kids of the chance to see adults doing adult things. Children are desperate to be grown; the magic of childhood is only magic to adults. When we make our lives all about kid stuff, our children don't see us doing the kinds of things they will one day do. They don't have a model of adult behavior to emulate as they strive to mature. It's good for kids to see us having adult conversations, reading adult books, and doing adult work.
5. It is annoying to other adults. If you want to have friends, you better have hobbies and work and interests outside of your kids. Cause Grandma is the only person who thinks your kids are as interesting as you do. And even she probably has a limit.
Sometimes living life in a non-child-centered way (self-centered, perhaps?) is active, rather than passive. It means saying yes, not just no. I try to include Livy in as many of my activities as I can because she wants to be with me and she wants to learn how to be an adult. I like for her to play at my feet while I discuss intellectual property with a friend. I like for her to be at a friend's party so that she can learn the social skills adults use to interact with friends. I like for her to travel with me because I like for her to see the world, the real world, not just playgrounds and jumpy castles, but the museums, the shops, and the restaurants. I like for her to hear my music, see my TV shows and movies, and hear my books, so that she knows that The Wiggles, Backyardigans, and Dr. Seuss are not the only art there is in the world.
Now, lest someone use this post for evil, I do not mean that parents never have to do anything they don't want to do. I didn't particularly want to change 800 million dirty diapers, but that's what I signed on for, and I had to do it. But we do not sign on for 18 years of being subject to someone else's values. We do the things that are necessary for children to grow and flourish (meeting physical and emotional needs), but 10 games of Hi Ho Cherry-O is not a need for anyone. My child will not be scarred and feel unloved if I do not stay and watch every soccer game she plays. She will not have poor self-esteem because I did not want to hear her describe her 48th painting of the day in excruciating detail. She will not be conceptually impaired because she overheard me talking about my political opinions before she understands their philosophical underpinnings. In fact, I think that she will grow up better knowing that I have adult stuff to do and that one day, she will have adult stuff to do too.
Here's a picture of me and Livy, at an Atlanta Objectivist party with (gasp!) beer and guitar playing. Just before this I was making up funny songs, and now Reid is giving us a solo. It was late at night. She was not in bed, dreaming of the magic of childhood. She was in the world, watching adults interact, and learning how to be a grown-up Objectivist. About 15 minutes later, she passed out on a couch.
Round Up
The Objectivist Round Up is up!!
And for an added bonus treat, a cute picture of Morgan, Ryan, and Livy at last year's allergy awareness walk.
And for an added bonus treat, a cute picture of Morgan, Ryan, and Livy at last year's allergy awareness walk.
2/10/10
Update on my Progress: Connection Before Correction
After the positive discipline lecture I attended, I decided to try to use Connection Before Correction to put a stop to some power struggles Livy and I had been having. I felt that we were getting caught up in heated arguments, and I decided to stop and reconnect before we tried to solve whatever problem it was. I also had some nifty strategies for reconnecting in that post; please go read them and use them, so that they won't have been an entire waste of my life. Cause I never got to use them. As it turns out, the power struggles were all my fault, and once I had myself in check, we never got as far as any reconnecting strategies.
I'm still very glad that I did my thinking about the reconnecting before problem solving because it did solve our problem. Just not in the way I thought it would. Turns out WE did not need to reconnect; I needed to reconnect and not start power struggles. When I remembered to take a deep breath and think of how much I love Livy and how she is learning and may not be perfect and that her feelings really count, not just mine, we skipped right into solutions with no trouble from MY temper.
Here's a before and after example.
Before -
Me: Livy, please brush your teeth. It is nearly time to go.
Livy: I'm almost finished with the computer.
Me: (thinking, but not saying) Why can't you ever just get ready when I say!! ARRRRGGGHHHH! You are so slow. That damn computer, I wish I could throw it in the trash!!!!
Me: (in a bossy exasperated way) Livy, I said we had to go now. We can't be late. Go brush your teeth.
Livy: (tears) I don't want to go. Why do you always tell me what to do?
Me: (yelling) GET READY NOW!!!!
After -
Me: Livy, please brush your teeth. It is nearly time to go.
Livy: I'm almost finished with the computer.
Me: (thinking, but not saying) It sucks to be interrupted when you are doing something. I can see why she wouldn't want to jump right up like a trained monkey.
Me: (in a calm and empathetic way) I know you don't want to leave your game, but we will be late if I let you play anymore. Can I help you find a way to pause it so you won't have to start over? Would you like to take your Leapster in the car?
Livy: (still not thrilled) Well, okay. I know how to pause it. I'll play it right when we get home.
So much better. And the difference? MY attitude. Livy is very, very independent. ** She likes to do what she wants to do, she likes to run her own life, and I am glad of that quality. But, that also means that she doesn't like it when I do, legitimately, have to tell her what to do. Seriously, who does like that, except Peter Keating? So, when I do have to boss her, I can at least do it with the attitude of being sorry that I have to and hoping to make it as painless as possible for her.
So connection before correction worked for me, just not in the way I thought it would. It was I, not Livy, who needed to connect to what she is probably thinking, feeling, and wanting, and it was I, who needed to show empathy and love instead of impatience.
**Just as an interesting aside, I thought I would post this picture of Livy at about 8 months old. See me way in the background? That's cause even at 8 months, she didn't want any help. I was to stay out of her way and let her do things. (Just so no one has a heart attack, she didn't actually climb that wall at 8 months. But when she did, she didn't want my help!) That's one more example of how we all get who we get. See Jenn's post for more examples of getting who you get.
I'm still very glad that I did my thinking about the reconnecting before problem solving because it did solve our problem. Just not in the way I thought it would. Turns out WE did not need to reconnect; I needed to reconnect and not start power struggles. When I remembered to take a deep breath and think of how much I love Livy and how she is learning and may not be perfect and that her feelings really count, not just mine, we skipped right into solutions with no trouble from MY temper.
Here's a before and after example.
Before -
Me: Livy, please brush your teeth. It is nearly time to go.
Livy: I'm almost finished with the computer.
Me: (thinking, but not saying) Why can't you ever just get ready when I say!! ARRRRGGGHHHH! You are so slow. That damn computer, I wish I could throw it in the trash!!!!
Me: (in a bossy exasperated way) Livy, I said we had to go now. We can't be late. Go brush your teeth.
Livy: (tears) I don't want to go. Why do you always tell me what to do?
Me: (yelling) GET READY NOW!!!!
After -
Me: Livy, please brush your teeth. It is nearly time to go.
Livy: I'm almost finished with the computer.
Me: (thinking, but not saying) It sucks to be interrupted when you are doing something. I can see why she wouldn't want to jump right up like a trained monkey.
Me: (in a calm and empathetic way) I know you don't want to leave your game, but we will be late if I let you play anymore. Can I help you find a way to pause it so you won't have to start over? Would you like to take your Leapster in the car?
Livy: (still not thrilled) Well, okay. I know how to pause it. I'll play it right when we get home.
So much better. And the difference? MY attitude. Livy is very, very independent. ** She likes to do what she wants to do, she likes to run her own life, and I am glad of that quality. But, that also means that she doesn't like it when I do, legitimately, have to tell her what to do. Seriously, who does like that, except Peter Keating? So, when I do have to boss her, I can at least do it with the attitude of being sorry that I have to and hoping to make it as painless as possible for her.
So connection before correction worked for me, just not in the way I thought it would. It was I, not Livy, who needed to connect to what she is probably thinking, feeling, and wanting, and it was I, who needed to show empathy and love instead of impatience.
**Just as an interesting aside, I thought I would post this picture of Livy at about 8 months old. See me way in the background? That's cause even at 8 months, she didn't want any help. I was to stay out of her way and let her do things. (Just so no one has a heart attack, she didn't actually climb that wall at 8 months. But when she did, she didn't want my help!) That's one more example of how we all get who we get. See Jenn's post for more examples of getting who you get.
2/8/10
Three Good Things (post dessicated thyroid and iodine edition)
1. This morning I woke up and immediately got energetically down to business. I did several tasks that were on my to-do list right away.
2. I am feeling ambitious about my reading again. I feel like reading more that just pulpy novels. I am back to work on my American history book series (Joy Hakim's History of US), put Benjamin Franklin's Autobiography on reserve at the library, and started Moll Flanders and Howards End. I'm even feeling like doing some extra research for my book club on the sensibility debate of the late 18th century and on Romanticism in Sense and Sensibility.
3. I had energy to burn today, so I worked out. I am horribly out of shape, but my body felt so GOOD to be exercising again.
2. I am feeling ambitious about my reading again. I feel like reading more that just pulpy novels. I am back to work on my American history book series (Joy Hakim's History of US), put Benjamin Franklin's Autobiography on reserve at the library, and started Moll Flanders and Howards End. I'm even feeling like doing some extra research for my book club on the sensibility debate of the late 18th century and on Romanticism in Sense and Sensibility.
3. I had energy to burn today, so I worked out. I am horribly out of shape, but my body felt so GOOD to be exercising again.
2/4/10
Objectivist Round Up - Feb. 4, 2010
Welcome to the February 4, 2010 edition of Objectivist round up.
Burgess Laughlin presents Stephen Bourque analyzes mystic Dennis Prager posted at The Main Event, saying, "This is an interview with Objectivist weblog writer Stephen Bourque. In a long series of articles last year, he dissected the philosophical nature, foundations, and errors in Jewish mystic Dennis Prager's arguments for God as the only source of an absolutist ethics. Bourque rejects both the conventional atheists and the monotheists. The interview also reveals the nature of Bourque's activism and the qualities required to sustain it."
Rachel Miner presents Sick Days: From Splat to Spunky posted at The Playful Spirit, saying, "This post covers some tips for moving through the sick-kid drama in a more pleasant fashion and ending up with positive problem solving skills too!"
Brian Phillips presents Conservative Populism posted at Houston Property Rights, saying, "Glenn Beck can be both illuminating and infuriating. As an example of the latter, he recently made a statement on his radio show that the states have a right to institute universal health care, hand out free cars, etc. if the citizens of that state want such things. He stated that the federal government is barred from such actions, but the states are not. In other words, he is not opposed to violating individual rights; he just wants it done on a more local level."
Jim Woods presents President George Washington's First State Of the Union Address posted at Words by Woods, saying, "President Washington's address provides a stark contrast to that of President Obama and other recent Presidents."
Brian presents Interview: Jared Rhoads of the Lucidicus Project posted at Reality Talk, saying, ""Many of the students who write to us are so thrilled to have discovered The Lucidicus Project that they go on and on for paragraphs--usually along a storyline that roughly conveys the following: 1) everyone around them believes in some flavor of state intervention in healthcare, for example single-payer, 2) they know that there is something wrong with that approach, but 3) they don't know exactly what it is or how to articulate it.""
Mike Zemack presents Gay Marriage and Individual Rights posted at Principled Perspectives, saying, "Here is my take on why the bill to legalize same-sex marriage failed in my rather liberal state of New Jersey."
John Drake presents Connections - Kant to Hilter posted at Try Reason!, saying, "An older British TV show called Connections had an episode called Deja Vu where narrator James Burke showed a "connection" between Kant and Hilter."
Kirk presents Use It or Lose It posted at A is A, saying, "We now stand at a tipping point in history. History can sway one way towards a dictatorship with access to the most advanced weaponry on the planet, or we can utilize the intellectual freedoms we still possess; before it's too late. The choice is yours."
Ifat Glassman presents What is ethics and why do we need it? posted at Psychology of Selfishness, saying, "The essay demonstrate using daily experiences why we need ethics and what ethics is."
Tom Utley presents Republicans could learn a lot from Ron Paul posted at It's My Blog, saying, "Ron Paul is the most pro-liberty Republican of national prominence, yet he's hated by many of the party insiders, mostly for his stance on foreign policy. From the standpoint of a supporter of Rational Self Interest, I think the Republicans could learn a lot from Ron Paul, even though he is incorrect in his stance of total non-interventionism."
Paul Hsieh presents A Few Parallels From Shelter, Food, Epistemology, and Happiness posted at NoodleFood, saying, "Different variations of a classic trichotomy."
Kelly Elmore presents Acceptance and Parenting: Revisiting An Old Post Cause I Still Haven't Got It Through My Thick Skull posted at Reepicheep's Coracle, saying, "In which I think crazy thoughts but find peace in an old post."
Stella presents We know better. We're the government. posted at ReasonPharm, saying, "The Supreme Court's ruling on campaign finance may be a victory for free speech, but a recent FDA decision shows how much that right has been ignored in the pharmaceutical industry."
Sandi Trixx presents Digging Che posted at Sandi Trixx, saying, "How long before some of Cuba's laws are enacted under Obama?"
Diana Hsieh presents Thyroid Update: Desiccated Thyroid and Iodine posted at NoodleFood, saying, "After two months of living as a semi-corpse on the standard treatment for hypothyroidism (Synthroid), I got my life back with desiccated thyroid and iodine."
Beth Haynes presents Minimum Insurance laws and the Uninsured posted at Wealth is not the Problem, saying, "A cause-and-effect relationship exists between insurance mandates and the uninsured."
Beth Haynes presents "Basic Medical Care Insurance Access" posted at Wealth is not the Problem, saying, "When you hear people say that the United States is the only country without universal health care, here is how you can respond."
Jeff Montgomery presents Tea Party Fee Irony posted at Fun With Gravity, saying, "A tea party-related convention is criticized for -- gasp! -- charging a fee."
Edward Cline presents The State of His Audacity posted at The Rule of Reason, saying, "Watching a video the other evening of President Barack Obama’s State of the Union address (and later reading the transcript of it), I was struck by two things: the yawn-inducing banality of everything he said, because he has said it all before; and the blatantly collectivist nature of the speech, one barely disguised by its sugary “progressive” coating. Throughout his speech, it was “I am disappointed with the lack of progress by Congress in implementing a socialist agenda, and so we must stop bickering and get things done.”"
C.W. presents The Question of Obama posted at Krazy Economy, saying, "We don't like Obama and think that he will do things that will harm the country. But, how far will he go? What do you think?"
That concludes this edition. Submit your blog article to the next edition of
I dedicate this roundup to Ayn Rand's birthday! And to celebrate the birth of this awesome thinker, here are a few awesome quotes of hers:
"Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won, it exists, it is real, it is possible, it’s yours."
Burgess Laughlin presents Stephen Bourque analyzes mystic Dennis Prager posted at The Main Event, saying, "This is an interview with Objectivist weblog writer Stephen Bourque. In a long series of articles last year, he dissected the philosophical nature, foundations, and errors in Jewish mystic Dennis Prager's arguments for God as the only source of an absolutist ethics. Bourque rejects both the conventional atheists and the monotheists. The interview also reveals the nature of Bourque's activism and the qualities required to sustain it."
Rachel Miner presents Sick Days: From Splat to Spunky posted at The Playful Spirit, saying, "This post covers some tips for moving through the sick-kid drama in a more pleasant fashion and ending up with positive problem solving skills too!"
Brian Phillips presents Conservative Populism posted at Houston Property Rights, saying, "Glenn Beck can be both illuminating and infuriating. As an example of the latter, he recently made a statement on his radio show that the states have a right to institute universal health care, hand out free cars, etc. if the citizens of that state want such things. He stated that the federal government is barred from such actions, but the states are not. In other words, he is not opposed to violating individual rights; he just wants it done on a more local level."
Jim Woods presents President George Washington's First State Of the Union Address posted at Words by Woods, saying, "President Washington's address provides a stark contrast to that of President Obama and other recent Presidents."
Brian presents Interview: Jared Rhoads of the Lucidicus Project posted at Reality Talk, saying, ""Many of the students who write to us are so thrilled to have discovered The Lucidicus Project that they go on and on for paragraphs--usually along a storyline that roughly conveys the following: 1) everyone around them believes in some flavor of state intervention in healthcare, for example single-payer, 2) they know that there is something wrong with that approach, but 3) they don't know exactly what it is or how to articulate it.""
Mike Zemack presents Gay Marriage and Individual Rights posted at Principled Perspectives, saying, "Here is my take on why the bill to legalize same-sex marriage failed in my rather liberal state of New Jersey."
John Drake presents Connections - Kant to Hilter posted at Try Reason!, saying, "An older British TV show called Connections had an episode called Deja Vu where narrator James Burke showed a "connection" between Kant and Hilter."
Kirk presents Use It or Lose It posted at A is A, saying, "We now stand at a tipping point in history. History can sway one way towards a dictatorship with access to the most advanced weaponry on the planet, or we can utilize the intellectual freedoms we still possess; before it's too late. The choice is yours."
Ifat Glassman presents What is ethics and why do we need it? posted at Psychology of Selfishness, saying, "The essay demonstrate using daily experiences why we need ethics and what ethics is."
Tom Utley presents Republicans could learn a lot from Ron Paul posted at It's My Blog, saying, "Ron Paul is the most pro-liberty Republican of national prominence, yet he's hated by many of the party insiders, mostly for his stance on foreign policy. From the standpoint of a supporter of Rational Self Interest, I think the Republicans could learn a lot from Ron Paul, even though he is incorrect in his stance of total non-interventionism."
Paul Hsieh presents A Few Parallels From Shelter, Food, Epistemology, and Happiness posted at NoodleFood, saying, "Different variations of a classic trichotomy."
Kelly Elmore presents Acceptance and Parenting: Revisiting An Old Post Cause I Still Haven't Got It Through My Thick Skull posted at Reepicheep's Coracle, saying, "In which I think crazy thoughts but find peace in an old post."
Stella presents We know better. We're the government. posted at ReasonPharm, saying, "The Supreme Court's ruling on campaign finance may be a victory for free speech, but a recent FDA decision shows how much that right has been ignored in the pharmaceutical industry."
Sandi Trixx presents Digging Che posted at Sandi Trixx, saying, "How long before some of Cuba's laws are enacted under Obama?"
Diana Hsieh presents Thyroid Update: Desiccated Thyroid and Iodine posted at NoodleFood, saying, "After two months of living as a semi-corpse on the standard treatment for hypothyroidism (Synthroid), I got my life back with desiccated thyroid and iodine."
Beth Haynes presents Minimum Insurance laws and the Uninsured posted at Wealth is not the Problem, saying, "A cause-and-effect relationship exists between insurance mandates and the uninsured."
Beth Haynes presents "Basic Medical Care Insurance Access" posted at Wealth is not the Problem, saying, "When you hear people say that the United States is the only country without universal health care, here is how you can respond."
Jeff Montgomery presents Tea Party Fee Irony posted at Fun With Gravity, saying, "A tea party-related convention is criticized for -- gasp! -- charging a fee."
Edward Cline presents The State of His Audacity posted at The Rule of Reason, saying, "Watching a video the other evening of President Barack Obama’s State of the Union address (and later reading the transcript of it), I was struck by two things: the yawn-inducing banality of everything he said, because he has said it all before; and the blatantly collectivist nature of the speech, one barely disguised by its sugary “progressive” coating. Throughout his speech, it was “I am disappointed with the lack of progress by Congress in implementing a socialist agenda, and so we must stop bickering and get things done.”"
C.W. presents The Question of Obama posted at Krazy Economy, saying, "We don't like Obama and think that he will do things that will harm the country. But, how far will he go? What do you think?"
That concludes this edition. Submit your blog article to the next edition of
Objectivist round up using our carnival submission form. Past posts and future hosts can be found on our blog carnival index page.
objectivist round up, blog carnival.
2/2/10
Acceptance and Parenting: Revisiting An Old Post Cause I Still Haven't Got It Through My Thick Skull
This morning I said, "Hey Livy, when I get back from work in an hour and a half, do you want to go out and do something cool? Maybe the zoo or the botanical gardens? Something really fun?" Her answer was, "No, mom. We always go out and do fun stuff. I just want to stay home and play my computer games today."
Well, I was super disappointed. Staying home sucks. Why, oh why, did I get such a stick in the mud child who wants to do boring stuff like computer games when we could be out and about enjoying life? What kind of a weird person likes to stay home? What's wrong with her? What have I done wrong to make her this way?
Now, when I begin to bewail the attributes of my child and question my entire parenting philosophy, it might be time to take a deep breath and practice some acceptance. So, I reframed. I remembered that it is okay for other people (gasp! even my child) to be different from me. I thought of all the cool introverts I know who really do like to stay home and engage in solitary sorts of pursuits, and I remembered that those are the people likely to cure cancer or write the great American novel. I thought about my own selfish needs; perhaps I need to get out more by myself? And then I dug this old post out of the vaults. It was true when I wrote it; it is true now; and reading it again made me feel more relaxed and accepting of who my child is. (It was also a nice plus to see that, though she isn't much more interested, Livy has learned to read since this post.)
Here's the old post, entitled Mustering Up the Serenity to Accept the Things I Cannot (and Should Not) Change:
I've been thinking today about acceptance being a key aspect of good parenting. I think we all have a tendency to want our children to share our favorite personality traits with us, our likes and dislikes, and our talents. It's natural; we want our children to be like us and to be people we have lots in common with. But I think we really must keep this desire in check. We do not get to create people in our own image. Instead, we have to nurture the people we get.
I am a reader, big time. I read all the time - trashy pulp novels, great classics, and everything in between. I find it incredibly hard to relax about Livy's lack of interest in books. She doesn't want to learn to read right now, and she isn't too interested in hearing me read books to her. She enjoys it sometimes, but not like I do. I have to remind myself often that Livy isn't me; she will be her own kind of person. There are good people, happy, rational people, who aren't readers the way that I am.
Another example is how she is a homebody. I love to go out places all the time. In my perfect world, I would only be home long enough to get the basic chores done, and then I would go out again. Livy, on the other hand, would rather stay home most of the day. She likes to play quietly in her room a lot, and that's okay. I have to remind myself that there are lots of happy, rational people who are introverts and enjoy their time at home very much.
I guess what I mean is this: Our children are not ours for molding. They come equipped with talents, likes, and dislikes, and it is not our business as parents to go changing those things. It is only our business to help them learn what they like and dislike and the skills to use THEIR talents to accomplish THEIR goals.
Well, I was super disappointed. Staying home sucks. Why, oh why, did I get such a stick in the mud child who wants to do boring stuff like computer games when we could be out and about enjoying life? What kind of a weird person likes to stay home? What's wrong with her? What have I done wrong to make her this way?
Now, when I begin to bewail the attributes of my child and question my entire parenting philosophy, it might be time to take a deep breath and practice some acceptance. So, I reframed. I remembered that it is okay for other people (gasp! even my child) to be different from me. I thought of all the cool introverts I know who really do like to stay home and engage in solitary sorts of pursuits, and I remembered that those are the people likely to cure cancer or write the great American novel. I thought about my own selfish needs; perhaps I need to get out more by myself? And then I dug this old post out of the vaults. It was true when I wrote it; it is true now; and reading it again made me feel more relaxed and accepting of who my child is. (It was also a nice plus to see that, though she isn't much more interested, Livy has learned to read since this post.)
Here's the old post, entitled Mustering Up the Serenity to Accept the Things I Cannot (and Should Not) Change:
I've been thinking today about acceptance being a key aspect of good parenting. I think we all have a tendency to want our children to share our favorite personality traits with us, our likes and dislikes, and our talents. It's natural; we want our children to be like us and to be people we have lots in common with. But I think we really must keep this desire in check. We do not get to create people in our own image. Instead, we have to nurture the people we get.
I am a reader, big time. I read all the time - trashy pulp novels, great classics, and everything in between. I find it incredibly hard to relax about Livy's lack of interest in books. She doesn't want to learn to read right now, and she isn't too interested in hearing me read books to her. She enjoys it sometimes, but not like I do. I have to remind myself often that Livy isn't me; she will be her own kind of person. There are good people, happy, rational people, who aren't readers the way that I am.
Another example is how she is a homebody. I love to go out places all the time. In my perfect world, I would only be home long enough to get the basic chores done, and then I would go out again. Livy, on the other hand, would rather stay home most of the day. She likes to play quietly in her room a lot, and that's okay. I have to remind myself that there are lots of happy, rational people who are introverts and enjoy their time at home very much.
I guess what I mean is this: Our children are not ours for molding. They come equipped with talents, likes, and dislikes, and it is not our business as parents to go changing those things. It is only our business to help them learn what they like and dislike and the skills to use THEIR talents to accomplish THEIR goals.
The Best Frangrances To Women Love
Frangrances have 3 ‘notes’. The base which lasts the longest, the middle and the upper. Favourite bases in oil based fragrances are ambergris (not available in the US because of animal protection laws) and dehen. The best frangrances are those where the notes make love to one another on your skin and let out a range of frangrances that are interated but different…kind of like the colours of the northern lights!
It really all depends on what your own likes are but I think anything with the bulgarian rose (or Taifi rose as they call it in arabic shops) and a dehen base smells good for summer I’m not sure about women’s frangrances for winter. Zara have a fantastic stock of single note frangrances at a very cheap price. They have bulgarian rose by itself.
2/1/10
Free Range Parenting Blog Post
I loved this blog post. I wish the writer of it was my neighbor. She has it totally right about our culture of fear and how we should be living instead. If Livy isn't one day able to walk home from less than 2 miles away, I may have to sell her to the gypsies and get a cat. They can always get home, right?
Hypothyroidism and Hashimoto's
Inspired by the help Diana's comments have been to me, I thought I would give a little update on my health and what my plans are. For most of my adult life, I have been a little overweight, and I have had a really hard time losing weight. Like, I really keep to a good diet and exercise moderately, and nada. I have also always had super low blood pressure, pulse rate, and body temperatures. After I had a baby, things got worse. I had more trouble than ever keeping weight off, and I experienced really bad post-partum depression. I have also always needed a ridiculous amount of sleep (10-11 hours) to feel good and rested. I have a tendency to constipation and super dry skin. I have a bump just above my collarbone that I can feel from the outside and when I swallow. Until recently, I just thought these things were my "normal."
I first got suspicious when I started to really improve my diet and eat paleo. I didn't lose weight like other people. I felt better and knew that it was good for me, but the weight didn't come off. I was very jealous of all these damn bloggers and OEvolve folks who started losing weight by cutting out crappy carbs and eating lots of fat.
Then, I started to feel awful. Those of you who know me know that I am super energetic - like bouncing off the walls, talking 90 to nothing, and always out of the house doing stuff. That changed about a month ago. I started to feel tired all the time. I stopped wanting to do things, and I started to sleep even more. (How many hours a day can a person sleep, for gods' sakes?) I haven't had the mental energy to read books or to work on languages. I haven't had the physical energy to be the active, out and about life learners that my daughter and I love to be. When I don't even want to go to the zoo or to the planetarium, I know something is wrong with me.
I'd been reading on the OEvolve list about Diana's struggles with hypothyroidism, and when Richard Nikoley made a post about hypothyroidism and paleo, I started to wonder. Could this be my deal? So I had some lab tests done on my own. I pay for medical care from a health savings account, so I can't just run down to the doctor to say I feel tired. Plus, I don't trust most doctors as far as I can throw them, so I wanted to have the info myself to research before I went to see an M.D. My lab results weren't normal. My TSH (Thyroid Stimulating Hormone) was out of the normal range by a good bit (5.7). My Free T3 and Free T4 were at the very bottom of the normal range. I also tested above the normal range for TgAB (antibodies that attack the carriers for thyroid horomone.
Basically, what this means is that my pituitary gland is working super overtime spewing out TSH, trying so very hard to make my thyroid make enough hormones. My thyroid is not making enough, as the Free T3 and Free T4 numbers show (these are two of the hormones the thyroid makes, floating free in my blood, ready to be used to regulate metabolism and make me want to go to the zoo). The antibodies present in my blood show that my immune system is busy attacking the little protein trucks that carry the already scanty amount of hormone to my zoo attendance receptors. The antibodies mean that I probably have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, an autoimmune disorder that causes hypothyroidism.
So, armed with these icky lab results, I started reading. My two highest recommendations are two that I got from Diana: Stop the Thyroid Madness by Janie Bowthorpe and Iodine: Why You Need It, Why You Can't Live Without It by David Brownstein. I learned that all those symptoms I had considered "normal" were NOT normal; they are hypothyroid symptoms. I learned a lot about different treatments. Here's what I have decided to do:
First, I started supplementing with iodine and selenium. Turns out that since I use sea salt (not iodized salt) and don't eat much seafood, I am probably very low in iodine. The amount in iodized salt (if I ate it) is enough to prevent goiters (enlarged thyroids, like mine) and mental retardation, but not enough to keep away thyroid problems and possibly breast cancer. I haven't had the iodine loading test yet (need to do that very soon), but I have started taking 12.5 mg of iodine and 400 mg of selenium daily. I am increasing my iodine to 25 mg tomorrow, but I don't know if I feel comfortable going higher than that without the iodine loading test.
Next, I got a doctor's appointment (this Thursday). I know what I want him to do, and unless he can convince me otherwise with his reason and facts and doctorly expertise, I will go to another doctor if he won't do it. I want to go on dessicated thyroid, not sythetic T4. The reason is that healthy thyroids produce lots of different thyroid hormones, not just T4. Seems logical, and it is backed up with lots of patient experiences, that the dessicated thyroid, which has the full range of thyroid hormones, would work better. I want to start with about 1 grain, and I want to move up to a higher dosage reasonably quickly. I want to be figure out the dosage of my medication based on how I am feeling, and not just on lab tests (especially not just TSH alone).
We'll see how the visit goes. The doctor is one recommended by other thyroid patients on www.thyroid.about.com, though that is no guarantee that he will be knowledgable or willing to do dessicated thyroid instead of synthetic T4. I'll let you all know how it goes.
I first got suspicious when I started to really improve my diet and eat paleo. I didn't lose weight like other people. I felt better and knew that it was good for me, but the weight didn't come off. I was very jealous of all these damn bloggers and OEvolve folks who started losing weight by cutting out crappy carbs and eating lots of fat.
Then, I started to feel awful. Those of you who know me know that I am super energetic - like bouncing off the walls, talking 90 to nothing, and always out of the house doing stuff. That changed about a month ago. I started to feel tired all the time. I stopped wanting to do things, and I started to sleep even more. (How many hours a day can a person sleep, for gods' sakes?) I haven't had the mental energy to read books or to work on languages. I haven't had the physical energy to be the active, out and about life learners that my daughter and I love to be. When I don't even want to go to the zoo or to the planetarium, I know something is wrong with me.
I'd been reading on the OEvolve list about Diana's struggles with hypothyroidism, and when Richard Nikoley made a post about hypothyroidism and paleo, I started to wonder. Could this be my deal? So I had some lab tests done on my own. I pay for medical care from a health savings account, so I can't just run down to the doctor to say I feel tired. Plus, I don't trust most doctors as far as I can throw them, so I wanted to have the info myself to research before I went to see an M.D. My lab results weren't normal. My TSH (Thyroid Stimulating Hormone) was out of the normal range by a good bit (5.7). My Free T3 and Free T4 were at the very bottom of the normal range. I also tested above the normal range for TgAB (antibodies that attack the carriers for thyroid horomone.
Basically, what this means is that my pituitary gland is working super overtime spewing out TSH, trying so very hard to make my thyroid make enough hormones. My thyroid is not making enough, as the Free T3 and Free T4 numbers show (these are two of the hormones the thyroid makes, floating free in my blood, ready to be used to regulate metabolism and make me want to go to the zoo). The antibodies present in my blood show that my immune system is busy attacking the little protein trucks that carry the already scanty amount of hormone to my zoo attendance receptors. The antibodies mean that I probably have Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, an autoimmune disorder that causes hypothyroidism.
So, armed with these icky lab results, I started reading. My two highest recommendations are two that I got from Diana: Stop the Thyroid Madness by Janie Bowthorpe and Iodine: Why You Need It, Why You Can't Live Without It by David Brownstein. I learned that all those symptoms I had considered "normal" were NOT normal; they are hypothyroid symptoms. I learned a lot about different treatments. Here's what I have decided to do:
First, I started supplementing with iodine and selenium. Turns out that since I use sea salt (not iodized salt) and don't eat much seafood, I am probably very low in iodine. The amount in iodized salt (if I ate it) is enough to prevent goiters (enlarged thyroids, like mine) and mental retardation, but not enough to keep away thyroid problems and possibly breast cancer. I haven't had the iodine loading test yet (need to do that very soon), but I have started taking 12.5 mg of iodine and 400 mg of selenium daily. I am increasing my iodine to 25 mg tomorrow, but I don't know if I feel comfortable going higher than that without the iodine loading test.
Next, I got a doctor's appointment (this Thursday). I know what I want him to do, and unless he can convince me otherwise with his reason and facts and doctorly expertise, I will go to another doctor if he won't do it. I want to go on dessicated thyroid, not sythetic T4. The reason is that healthy thyroids produce lots of different thyroid hormones, not just T4. Seems logical, and it is backed up with lots of patient experiences, that the dessicated thyroid, which has the full range of thyroid hormones, would work better. I want to start with about 1 grain, and I want to move up to a higher dosage reasonably quickly. I want to be figure out the dosage of my medication based on how I am feeling, and not just on lab tests (especially not just TSH alone).
We'll see how the visit goes. The doctor is one recommended by other thyroid patients on www.thyroid.about.com, though that is no guarantee that he will be knowledgable or willing to do dessicated thyroid instead of synthetic T4. I'll let you all know how it goes.
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